by Jeremy Bratt
“Right foot up for front kicks! Ready? Out!”
“One…two…three…four…five.”
“Hold!”
“One…two…three…four…five.”
“Back!”
“One…two…three…four…five. One, sir!” That wasn’t so bad. I can do four more of these.
“Out!”
“One…two…ok, this is starting to get hard…three…four…seriously? After one kick I’m this tired already?…five.”
“Hold”
“One…oh man, holding is the worst!…two…three…four…five.”
“Back!”
“Thank goodness…one…two…three…what if I only counted to four? Would anyone really know?…four…no, that’s cheating. Darn it…five. Two, sir!”
“Come on! Get those legs up! Out!”
“One…two…three…come on, you’re halfway there…four…five.”
“Hold!”
“One…two…three…wait, only halfway there? And it hurts this much?…four…five.”
“Back!”
“One…two…three…four…finish this one and it’s all downhill from here…five. Three, sir!”
“Out!”
“One…ohhhhh, this one is definitely not easier…two…three…four…hmmm, my calf muscle has never hurt quite like this before…five.”
“Hold! Come on, get those kicks above waist-level!”
“One…I am definitely not waist-level…two…three…I am barely at knee-level…four…five.”
“Back!”
“One…I wonder what hurts more, my supporting leg or my kicking leg?…two…three…Hmmmm, thinking about which one hurts more actually made them both hurt more…four…That’s interesting…five. Four, sir!”
“Last one, get those knees up! Up! Out!”
“One…two…it doesn’t help that the guy next to me is really flexible…three…how can he possibly kick that high?…four…five.”
“Hold!”
“One…this is the last one…two…get through this and you’re fine…three…almost there…four…almost…five.”
“Keep holding! Get those kicks up! I’ll wait until they’re up!”
No, please don’t wait. Be merciful, Mr. Surage. “Back!”
“One…two…three…can time move this slowly?…four…five. Five sir!”
“Ok, put your leg down.”
Phew! Ok. Shake out my legs. Well, that wasn’t so bad. I feel kind of good!
“Left leg up for slow kicks!
Oh man…